liana l i a n a (-:

k

i didn’t need to talk to you.

i just wanted to talk to you.

i didn’t need you to be with me.

i wanted you to want to be with me.


shouldn’t you feel happy that i’m into you more than how you feel towards me?

but so what, i didn’t care.

it was just the way you put it out, you were not proud of it.

is it how you think of our future together?

your friends, your family, the community?


you said you don’t have much stories to tell.

it’s because you chose not to.

but for this, you could have just kept it to yourself. 


last night i dreamt you were angry.

you said i had no sympathy maybe because in reality, 

i might ended it too abruptly you might not see it coming.

if it was true, i hope you forgive me.


thanks for giving us a chance.

for proving that it’s not our cultural differences that set us apart, but solely on how feelings drifted.

otherside of the world

'over the sea and far away
she's waiting like an iceberg, waiting to change.
but she's cold inside. 
she wants to be like the water.

all the muscles tighten in her face,
buries her soul in one embrace
they're one and the same, just like water'

positive vibes, not!
i might lack creativity but this is the best blog template i ever created for myself.
10 years and running!
btw, i'm blogging today to express my current thoughts;
- i can't live by myself, though i found a place. my parents totally objected the idea at the end of dec 2020.
because they said i couldn't take care of myself. maybe for my weakness in cockroaches, lizards and ants.
worst nightmare. 
- my work promotion. the more i want it, the harder i work for it, it is not coming.
- the feeling of 'void'. 

sighs. crying myself goodnight.

February 2012 August 2012 April 2014 May 2017 October 2018 February 2021